03/17/2006: 
Asshat of the Week
Smoking Banned Outside In Calabasas, CA
from ABC 7 Los Angeles
The city council of Calabasas, CA wins the award of Asshat of the Week in honor of their "Comprehensive Secondhand Smoke Control Ordinance," which bans smoking outside in areas where the smoke may reach others. Smoking ouside is allowed in designated "smoker's ghettos" and inside your home as long as the air in the area you are smoking in doesn't empty into a place where it can possibly reach others (ie not on your porch), or if anyone complains about it. Those who do not comply will be given warnings and citations, with as yet unnamed further penalites for willful and repeat offenders.
Watch out all you overweight folks- one of these days they will come after you for eating donuts and hamburgers in public. Did you know how many chemicals are in those things? Ronald Mc Donald is no different from Joe Camel. By golly, there is mounds of proof that if you smell the second-hand aroma of a donut, there is the possibility that not only will you get cancer and die, you may even want to eat a donut too. Why should we eat or drink or talk in public for that matter? If you talk, you might hurt someone's feelings and the last thing that you should ever do is offend anyone for any reason anytime anywhere and it's the government's job to make sure nothing bad ever happens to you.
Just do us all a favor- either go to Calabasas and smoke in a mass act of civil disobedience or stay in your vealpen. The time for the fight for sanity in politics is drawing near my friends.
I will go and find a copy of this ordinance and post it here later.
